Sunday, August 21, 2011

Anxiety

Well, I'm writing this on my iPad using my awesome new keyboard that I just got for school! It's super cool, and it makes my iPad like a laptop, which is so much more useful for me. I just thought I'd brag for a second. However, that being said, I don't know how to put pictures on my blog from my iPad, so unfortunately this post won't have pictures. :( But it is more of a serious post, so perhaps pictures aren't necessary.

Lately, I've been super anxious about school starting. For those of you who don't know, I've taught fourth grade for the past four years now. Pretty fun stuff. However, the last few years I've felt more and more restless in teaching, and I realized that I needed a change. After a lot of prayer and discussion I decided to go back to school for a master's degree. So, this year, I am going to be a full-time student and a part-time teacher. I'll be taking 12 hours (eek!) and working at my previous school for 15 hours a week.

While I am so excited about graduate school, and I know that going back is the right choice, I am very worried. I worry about the silliest things too. I'm paranoid about missing orientation, not knowing where to park, what to wear, impressing people, getting my student ID, getting my parking pass, and on and on and on and on...

I know that this is ridiculous. I know that I'm freaking out about nothing. I know that going back to school will be difficult, but not nearly as difficult as I am thinking it will be. And really, it all comes down to pride.

I'm concerned about all of these things because of me. I want to do well, I want to be impressive, I want to be well liked, I want to be remembered. Are you seeing a theme here? It's all about ME. And that is a problem. It needs to be all about God. I should desire to do well so that GOD gets the glory, not me. I have to trust Him and keep His glory the center of everything. Only then will I have the peace that passes all understanding.

So that's where I'm at. Trying to keep anxiety at bay, and loving God more and more every day.

Maybe I should pursue my master's in poetry...

Just kidding.

Your turn!
- Do you ever feel anxious and worried? What do you worry about?

- HOW DO YOU COPE?

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